I stopped counting my days by 24-hour periods. There are no Mondays, Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Thursdays and Fridays in my weeks. Nor are there Saturdays and Sundays on my weekends. It is instead a matter of good days and bad days. And my yardstick of measure to how good or bad they are, is my Mother. She’s 90. And has Dementia. In addition to several other ailments that come with old age and make just staying alive a miserable challenge. Only if you live with a parent who has Dementia, or even Parkinson’s or Alzheimer’s, do you realize how sad and cruel life can also be – for them and for you. These are all progressive brain diseases. And it saddens and frightens me to see how regressive they make a once healthy person.
If Mother has slept well, if she is bright and cheerful next morning, and has her breakfast and bath without a fuss, takes her medicines without spitting them out, is alert and awake and involved with life, and cooperates with her attendant, then my day is good. But I don’t celebrate because it can change any moment. And if she has had an agitated night, keeping me awake and on my feet checking on her constantly, and if she is argumentative, defiant, tired and cranky subsequently, her memory loss is even more pronounced, she is confused and cannot concentrate, and gives me a strong fight over everything, then my day is bad and emotionally overwhelming. In a week, I have more bad days than good. As a result, I have learned to live with it.
I find it hard to accept how easily and suddenly she has slipped from being an elegant old lady with airs and graces and genteel ways to somebody who is childlike and troublesome, in diapers all day, lost and teary, demanding attention, needing help with all bodily functions. If it was possible to die of a broken heart, then I would have died long ago. And with me, many others similarly and hopelessly and helplessly watching their parents painfully fading away. But there are good days on which Mother acts almost normal, playing cards with her attendant, cheating wickedly and then petulantly throwing down the cards if she loses like a spoiled little girl. It’s amazing how happy this makes me. It’s the little things that matter.
About Mark Manuel
The above thoughts/content has been proudly copied from the wall of Sir Mark Manuel. Being interviewing almost every role model of this country and going stronger each day. Mark Manuel is a respected Mumbai editor, writer, and columnist.
With over three decades of journalism in leading publications. This includes the Free Press Journal, Times, Dainik Bhaskar, Mid-Day, and Afternoon. He is famous for his brilliant pen interviews. He himself is a TEDx speaker.
Further
His interviews have been featured in several leading media houses. They include the Hindustan Times, Huffington Post, BBC, and Network 18. Almost every famous person has been interviewed by him in the country from Mother Teresa to Muhammad Ali. His first book is just out. It’s titled Moryaa Re! It is a crime thriller that is perhaps the country’s first police procedural. He began his career covering crime. And in a tribute to his experience and knowledge of this beat.
Several distinguished officers of the Mumbai Police and its Crime Branch collaborated with him to make this book possible. Amitabh Bachchan wrote the forward in a statement of friendship for Mark Manuel and admiration for his work.
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